Stage 6 of 10
Resentment
Pain has begun saying, “You owe me.”
What Can I Do Here?
- 1
Name what you believe the person owes you. Finish the sentence: “Because of what you did, you owe me ______.”
- 2
Ask what would finally be enough. An apology? Recognition? Money? Suffering? Humiliation? Restoring what was lost? Be honest about what your heart is demanding.
- 3
Give final repayment to God. This does not say the wrong was unimportant. Justice may still be needed. But you do not have to spend your life making the person pay.
Biblical Truth
Romans 12:17–21
We do not take personal revenge. We leave final repayment with God and seek to overcome evil with good.
Matthew 18:21–35
Jesus shows the danger of receiving mercy while refusing mercy to another.
Ephesians 4:32
Our forgiveness of others grows out of the forgiveness God has given us in Christ.
Put It Into Practice
Write one sentence: “I believe this person owes me ______.” Then ask what may rightly need to be restored and what you are demanding before you will allow yourself to be free.
A Helpful Voice
Resentment and bitterness can slowly eat away at spiritual life. That is why the debt must be faced before it quietly begins shaping the rest of life.
— Jerry Bridges
Key Thought
The debt may be real. Bitterness grows when my life becomes devoted to collecting it.