Stage 9 of 10
Spreading
The hurt is being carried into other relationships.
What Can I Do Here?
- 1
Ask who now carries your hurt. Who knows because you needed wise help? Who knows because you wanted someone to agree with you?
- 2
Do not gather a side. Talk with people who can help bring truth, wisdom, protection, or peace—not simply people who will join your anger.
- 3
Do not pass your wound to others. Children should not have to carry a parent’s grievance. Church members should not be recruited into another person’s quarrel. New relationships should not pay for old ones.
Biblical Truth
Hebrews 12:15
A bitter root can grow, cause trouble, and affect many people.
Proverbs 16:28
Destructive talk can separate close friends.
Matthew 18:15
In ordinary personal offense, Jesus first directs us toward the person who wronged us, not toward an audience.
Put It Into Practice
Think of the original conflict. Then name everyone who has been pulled into it. Which conversations were needed for help, and which ones simply spread the hurt?
Key Thought
Hurt may need a wise witness. Bitterness begins looking for a side.